Confession and Conclusion :p

Thursday, December 03, 2009 Fay 0 Comments

Okay, I admit, today I got my mind screwed up with
jealousy and self pity. It all started when I found out that some of
my friends and also some people I don't really know got more $ than me
in 2 online areas. One from the program I'm working on and another
from a program in Facebook application.

I felt that no matter how hard I learn and give my best efforts (well
at least I'm doing as much as I can) I still can't get good results.
Other people who don't do it the hard way seem to get great results
easier. It might a bit similar with the parable of the workers in the
vineyard on Matthew 20:1-16. Only to me it felt like I'm the only one
who get the least among all (too dramatic isn't it? :p). The rest... I
had to confess to Him that I thought He is not being fair to me :p I
know it's not true, I was just being honest with what I was thinking
to Him.

You see, I have a habit to pour out my troubled mind and mixed
feelings first so I can think more clearly. So I wrote a post on my
private blog (no one knows and no one can see it except me :p). And
after I got home from office I read these scriptures:

"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power,
of love, and of self-discipline
." (2Timothy 1:7)

Strike one. The comparison I did and those self pity thoughts had made
me discouraged. Actually all I need to do is just try again,
experimenting, and re-focus.

"Reflect on what I am saying, for The Lord will give you insight into
all this
." (2Timothy 2:7)

Strike two. He gives me a new hope and promise, He will guide me all
along, just like He always do.

"People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money..." (2Timothy
3:2 - "Godlessness in the Last Days")

He protects me from being one of them, lovers of money... I guess
that's why He didn't let me to get big amount of money fast. So I can
slow down, be patient meanwhile keep the perseverance to do my best
efforts. It's true because last night I had a dream about getting $$$
from the program I'm doing hahaha... It's a sign that it had gotten
too much of my attention :p

"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking,
correcting, and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may
be thoroughly equipped for every good work
." (2Timothy 3:16-17)

The last is a conclusion :)
He created me for a purpose, and He is equipping me so that I can do
every good work in righteousness. Amen for that :)

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