Just Some Thoughts...

There are times when it feels easier to be ignorant... to be a person who doesn't have expectations toward others... so you won't need to feel disappoint, you won't need to feel that you've mistreated by other people, you won't need to feel angry toward them, and you're simply just have a good moments with them...

There are times when it feels easier to detached from people... so you won't feel hurt if there are some mistakes or unpleasant things they've done, either accidentally or on purpose... You won't need to feel afraid to open up and let them "read" you...

But there are times when you know that you are really need others... despite their lack of sensitivities... there are times when you desperately need somebody or some people to share your life with... to spend times, share stories, and be as vulnerable as you can with them... without any fear, curiosity, prejudice, or doubt...

I've just had a bad moment with one of my friend, it's just an insignificant thing actually. But it brought my old similar memories...

When I was thinking of those thoughts, I just revolved around my emotions and myself... But when I remembered Him... How He managed His life and His responses toward other people... I just became speechless...

What He had gone through was absolutely harder... yet He responded with remarkable and amazing attitudes... It was never easy dealing with people... with all of our attributes (weaknesses, stubbornnes, hopelessness, deceitfulness, levity, you name it, there were a lot of them!) but He had gone through it all, flawlessly! He is soooo patient and soooo self-controlled... yet He was like an open book... without fear... and put His trust completely in His Father...

Dia pernah berurusan dengan orang-orang yang, udah mendapat kehormatan untuk jadi murid-muridNya (orang-orang yang Dia pilih sendiri), tapi di satu waktu mereka berdebat tentang siapa yang paling besar di antara mereka (Mark 9:33-37) - ibaratnya udah dikasih hati minta jantung hehehe... ga nyadar mereka itu lagi jalan ama Siapa...

Dia pernah ngadepin orang yang bersumpah ga bakal ninggalin Dia apapun yang terjadi, tapi kenyataannya orang itu ninggalin Dia, setelah sebelonnya menyangkal pernah kenal Dia...(Tapiii... karna orang ini bertobat 'n hidup dari keselamatan melalui Yesus, akhirnya dia malah dipake Tuhan luar biasa, yap, he is Peter a.k.a. Petrus).

Dia pernah ngadepin orang-orang yang memuja Dia, yang Dia sembuhin, bahkan mungkin yang ikut ngeliat keajaiban-keajaiban yang pernah Dia lakuin, tapi dimana mereka waktu Dia disalib? Mungkin malah ada beberapa orang di antara mereka yang ikut menuntut Dia untuk disalibkan di pengadilan Pilatus... How can He handled them all peacefully?

I think I need to learn more... and definitely need more help and guidance from Him...