Relationship Is Not a Ritual

Saat teduh 'n doa pagi... (check)
Baca Alkitab 1 perikop... (check)
Nyanyi pujian penyembahan... (check)
"Hmm... okay, then I'm good... my spiritual life is good..."

Tell me, is the list above just a ritual, or is it a relationship?

Can you imagine that you have a friend who calls you in the morning and say something like, "Hey morning... I just call you to say hi... and because I've committed to call you at least once a day, so here I am, calling you." Or imagine a friend gives you things (he or she thoughts you're gonna like it) that actually you don't like at all... because you know that their motivation is for their own ego instead of the relationship itself. Yes, ego, cause they think if they have done this and that for you, then they are qualified to be called your bestfriend or the most loyal friend, to have "I am a good friend" ("I am a good Christian") label... How do you feel about that? And can you imagine how God feels about all rituals we have done for him?

Seringkali, mungkin karna saking terbiasanya kita ama ritual kekristenan, kita jadi ga sadar apa perbedaan antara "having a real relationship with Him" ama "having spiritual rituals just to convince ourselves and others that we have a good relationship with Him".

I've been through some ritual experiences in my early days as a Christian. At first I did all the spiritual habbits to keep connected with God, like many people suggested such as: saat teduh tiap hari (bangun pagi jam 4), tiap hari baca alkitab minimal 1 perikop, doa minimal 1 jam, pujian penyembahan, etc... But that didn't work... I couldn't have the real connection with those obligations, that was kinda ridiculous...

Don't get me wrong... tiap orang bebas menyebut waktu dimana mereka berhubungan ama Tuhan dengan berbagai istilah, walau yang paling populer itu "saat teduh". Dan tiap orang juga bebas mau mengisi saat pribadi mereka ama Tuhan itu dengan apa aja, doa, nyanyi, apapun. Plus, setiap orang juga bebas mereka mau berdua ama Tuhan itu berapa lama 'n di mana. Tapi yang udah ridiculous adalah kalo satu atau dua kebiasaan itu dipaksakan kepada semua orang. Coz yang namanya relationship itu dibangun dari 2 pribadi yang menjalin hubungan itu, bukan oleh sederet "to do list" yang diklaim paling benar atau dijadikan patokan umum.

That's why I don't like to call my time with God as "saat teduh" or anything else... because in my honest opinion, that term is building an unhealthy boundary, seolah-olah kita cuman berkomunikasi ama Dia itu ya cuman 1 jam itu aja, atau 2 jam itu aja, selebihnya we are on our own. Padahal kalo emang mau diistilahin "saat teduh", ya sebenernya "saat teduh" kita 24 jam... cause we have an unlimited connection with Him. Bahkan kalo misalnya pas lagi break kerja atau sekolah atau apapun kegiatan kita, and kita pengen beberapa menit aja curhat atau doa ama Dia, we can do that right? Trus, Tuhan juga ga pernah mewajibkan kita buat melakukan semuanya dalam 1 waktu. Kita bisa aja doa pribadi ama Dia waktu pagi, trus ngerenungin Firman waktu malem, dll... It doesn't have to be in one package moment. So what's the point of making the term "saat teduh" anyway?

I just concern that establishing those kind of rituals has made people lost their chance of having the real relationship with God, since they would be more concerned about the spiritual habbits instead of the core thing. Hubungan itu kan dibangun dari dalam, yang nantinya akan menghasilkan suatu bentuk gaya berkomunikasi atau gaya interaksi dari 2 pribadi yang menjalin hubungan itu, bukan sebaliknya. Satu gaya interaksi atau gaya berkomunikasi yang dipaksakan kepada setiap orang ga bakal berhasil membangun suatu hubungan, coz urutannya terbalik.

Coba liat orang-orang yang deket ama Tuhan di Alkitab. Salah satunya Daud, yang suka menulis doa-doanya, permohonannya, nyanyiannya dan juga curhatnya dalam mazmur. Apakah hanya karena gaya interaksi Daud ama Tuhan yang kayak gitu trus kita semua harus nulis mazmur juga kayak dia? Enggak kan... (kalo aku mah ga masalah, coz gaya-ku rada mirip ama dia, sama-sama suka nulis doa 'n curhat di diary soalnya hihihi... yang ga mirip, dia suka nyanyi n nari, aku cuman suka nulis hehehe...) Whatever it is... intinya, each of us have the freedom to be unique in our relationship with Him, cause it's a personal relationship... (note on the word "personal").

Relationship is not a ritual, so let's stop acting like it is.