Malang Trip

True Forgiveness

Recently I’ve been reminded about one unsolved heart’s matter… and it made me realize that for all along I haven’t completely forgiven a person. I thought I did, but it turns out that I haven’t finished the process…

This morning, I imagined about Him… He’s been through something similar, even harder ones…

I imagine He was looking to people, one by one, who raise their hands… shouted His name in great joy, when He entered Jerusalem by a colt…
I imagine He was looking to people who followed Him, who have been healed by Him, who have been fed by Him in a miraculous night, who have been taught by Him… The faces that expressed gratitude, amazement, and loyalty…
(Not to mention His “faithful” diciples…)

But later on, He saw the same faces, this time full of anger and disgust… They shouted His name, this time in hatred, while He was in Pilate’s court… He saw their faces when they picked Barabbas over Him to be set free, when they cursed Him and demanded Him to be crucified…
(Not to mention the fact that His diciples had left Him all alone because of their own fear).

And… don’t forget about Peter’s denial, in spite of what he had said just before (Luke 22:33). Imagine that moment when Jesus saw Peter straight in the eye (Luke 22:61)…

I just speechless about what was on His mind and His heart at that time… either towards Peter or other people…

He, who is blameless and sinless, can forgive us…
While we, the same sinful people, tend to keep other’s faults and find it hard to forgive them…
It’s kinda ironic, don’t you think?

Forgiving is forgiving. End of sentence.

There’s no “but” or “even though” or “only if”…
Because a true forgiveness arises from a broken heart that has been completely restored by His unconditional love…

He said that to love Him is to obey Him (1John 5:3) and He wants us to forgive others (1 John 2:9, 1John 3:15, Luke 6:37, and Col 3:13)

Being Real is a Real Problem

(By Gregory Spencer)
Source: Boundless

When I was a boy, I spent many afternoons with my legs straddling a wide white branch of a walnut tree. I fingered the dials and wheels of the plywood instrument panel I knew would one day take my brother and me to Mars.

During dreamy summer days, we might pose any number of profound questions to each other, but our favorite was, "If you had to choose, would you rather go blind or deaf?" The answer could not have been more obvious to me then. I would rather go deaf, sight being too precious to lose. For the sighted, seeing is usually the most defining sense.

How much more so in an image-saturated culture. Unfortunately, in our times, we have come to believe that seeing is all that is necessary for experiencing. This is what I call the Gospel of Sight: What the eye values is the most important truth; the image — our image — is what matters most.

Though I don't dislike the media (I love movies. I watch TV), I take what I have assumed to be G.K. Chesterton's observation to heart: "The thinking person always resists the most dominant thing in his culture because the most dominant thing is always too dominant." I see "the most dominant thing" as the way images have influenced the way we think and behave. In light of our longing for and our need to develop authenticity (a virtue I define as "the courage to love with a rigorous inside-out consistency"), two consequences seem especially important.

The Gospel of Sight teaches us that appearances are all-in-all. We are image-driven, image-obsessed, image-conscious to a fault. The obvious needs to be asserted: We have defined "being attractive" in visual terms. Most commercials tell us that all that matters is being as beautiful and young and thin and fit and ripped as possible. That and being rich.

How can we be deeply authentic if we think that "how we look" is top priority? Of course, caring about our appearance is not unimportant or "beneath us." God made us to notice beauty and appreciate style. We each have our own personal "way of being," our God-given uniqueness, much of which is related to our image. Everything has a kind of style: dresses, cars, sermons, governments. If we wish to communicate well, we must attend to what sounds pleasing to others and to what our body "says." But our culture has grossly overstated the role of the image. As exercise guru Jack LaLanne says: "I can't die. It would ruin my image."

We are outside-in focused, instead of inside-out. Parents have said for years that it's what's on the inside that counts, but their voices get drowned out by the thousands of voices we hear every day to the contrary. We need better skin, brighter teeth, more glowing hair. We hear that everything in our future rests on our attractiveness. A woman admiring herself in an ad for Avia shoes wants it both ways: "She knows true beauty comes from the inside — but she doesn't mind finding it in the mirror."

Inevitably, this outside-in orientation makes our sense of self dependent on external forces. We need to be noticed, to be praised for our image — and we conspire to get that attention. Over a century ago, Henry Ward Beecher got it right: "Clothes do not make the man, but once he is made, they greatly improve his appearance."

We suffer a perfectionism exacerbated by the manipulation of pixels. Every commercial photo of a face or body is altered, enhanced, made more visually stunning. Yet the more perfect the image, the greater the distance from our imperfect lives. This disparity discourages and corrupts us, especially women. I have watched my three daughters struggle with these issues. It's hard enough to live up to a good friend's beauty; but how does one compare to a digitalized "perfection" that even the supermodel doesn't possess?

And analysis is not enough. Though I know the supermodel's skin is not impeccably unblemished, that her original image might have a pimple or tired eyes, I still say, "Wow, she's beautiful." Perfectionistic words are also associated with the images: "For flawless looks, spotless skin," etc. We cannot measure up so we bury ourselves in the guilt of starvation diets and persistent self-deprecation.

We may be paying a higher price as well. Recently I asked one of my classes why so many of their generation were committing suicide. Their responses surprised me. They said that because so many resources were at their disposal, they had no good reason not to make the world better. And they should be able to make themselves better as well — perfect even — and they couldn't bear the weight.

The resonance in the classroom seemed profound to me. Yes, the world's problems overwhelm them. But the depressing tipping point is that they feel they should be dramatically other than they are. They have no excuse not to live up to the consistent messages that they ought to be perfect.

The Gospel of Sight presents "illusion" as preferable to the authentic. When my family is on vacation, someone often says, "Ooh, look at the scenery! That would make such a good picture." My typical response is, "Yes, but isn't it a good landscape? I mean, isn't it worthy without being a photograph?" It's not that I dislike photographs or images — really. It's just that they have changed the way we experience the world, and we ought to do our best to understand these ways.

The illusion becomes the standard. This last Christmas, my wife and younger daughters and I visited my eldest daughter who, at that time, was living in St. Petersburg, Russia. After getting robbed in the Metro and negotiating the somewhat uninviting city for eight days, I was delighted to spend the next five days in London before returning home to California. I said, "Ah, London is wonderful; it's like Disneyland." Ouch. Shouldn't I have said that Disneyland was like London? For shame! Somehow, the faux-reality of Disneyland has burrowed into my head as the higher standard of excellence.

This "standard of illusion" can be seen in every day life. If the norms for the speed of romance are adopted from film, we may think our own plodding efforts ought to be pumped up. And nature television has become the norm for nature. Real nature just doesn't measure up. It is not populated with enough "cute" or "fierce" beasts, nor do the wild things perform for us as they should.

Perhaps our declining participation in authentic experiences makes being authentic more difficult. We're uncomfortable in the wilderness of genuineness. We tend to be either too blunt or too evasive. At any rate, inexorably, the standard of illusion leads to my next point.

We prefer illusion. As a freshman in college, I had on my wall a newspaper photo of my girlfriend as she was receiving her crown as Homecoming princess. To this day, I am convinced that I broke up with her because she failed to live up to the photograph. You may think me shallow but I had constructed my fantasy and I was sticking with it. When we were together, she didn't look as idyllically beautiful, nor did she treat me as I imagined she should: with that radiant smile, those perfect eyes, that facial expression that let me know I was the center of her life. In person, she was, well, a person, and I preferred my image of her.

Journalist Kiku Adatto says this choice makes a curious kind of sense: "In a media-conscious environment, authenticity means becoming the master of your own artificiality." Why would a fake authenticity become preferable? Charles Williams' cautionary thriller Descent into Hell provides some insight. He tells the story of middle-aged Lawrence Wentworth who has a romantic crush on a much younger woman, Adela. In Williams' supernatural scheme, Wentworth's desire for Adela is so strong that, once Adela rejects him, he "creates" an illusion of Adela who caters to his every desire. Once, during a torrential rain, the real Adela shows up at his door and asks to be let in. Wentworth looks at the phantom Adela in his room and then out at the real one, wet and needy. Williams' says, "He recognized well enough that the real Adela might have given him considerable trouble to lift, but his whole damnation was that he would not choose the trouble to lift the real Adela."

I have been haunted by this line for years. What and who are the "real Adelas" in our lives that we refuse to lift? When do we dwell in our imagined ideal and ignore the plain truth in front of us — or inside of us? In order to live a rigorous inside-out consistency, we have to be willing to face, among other things, tragic realities. If we pretend that we don't have problems or that the world is "just fine," we will be more deeply shaken when tragedy comes our way.

Perhaps this explains some troubled marriages and divorces. Newlyweds can be shocked when they discover the darker sides of their spouse.

At my college, I sometimes hear students say (after the revelation of some terrible event on campus), "I can't believe that could happen at Westmont." I think, "Why? Do you not know that Westmont is inhabited by people?" Many of us prefer the illusion that followers of Jesus lead outwardly better lives, that they always have superior marriages, more fulfilling jobs, less tragedy. We would be better off telling the truth about our humanity, even the difficult, tragic truths. Jesus says that "the truth will set you free" (John 8:32).

As we grow increasingly comfortable with illusion, we may find that we are more concerned with creating ourselves than with knowing ourselves. We alter our outer selves incessantly: our hair color, facial features, body shapes — anything to keep looking young. And we also alter our inner selves. We affirm a version of "the Good Life" that keeps our souls in a gated community, safe from the need to deal with uncomfortable realities. We may also distance ourselves from friends who tell us disagreeable truths, especially truths about ourselves. And since we know how far we are from the image we present, we know others are distant also and so, ironically, we don't trust them.

Living in the age of the image is often thrilling and pleasing. But when its qualities dominate all others — when the Gospel of Sight reigns supreme — authenticity is threatened. The loud and flashy world shouts down this quiet virtue. A sincere effort will be required of us if we hope to be more genuine.

Faceless Generation - Story from Papua

Oktovianus Pogau 

Bunga Dalam Pot Retak

Rumah kami langsung berseberangan dengan pintu masuk RS John Hopkins di Baltimore. Kami tinggal dilantai dasar dan menyewakan kamar-kamar lantai atas pada para pasien yang ke klinik itu.

Suatu petang dimusim panas, ketika aku sedang menyiapkan makan malam, ada orang mengetuk pintu. Saat kubuka, yang kutatap ialah seorang pria dengan wajah yang benar buruk sekali rupanya. "Lho, dia ini juga hampir cuma setinggi anakku yang berusia 8 tahun," pikirku ketika aku mengamati tubuh yang bungkuk dan sudah serba keriput ini. Tapi yang mengerikan ialah wajahnya, begitu miring besar sebelah akibat bengkak, merah dan seperti daging mentah., hiiiihh...!

Tapi suaranya begitu lembut menyenangkan ketika ia berkata, "Selamat malam. Saya ini kemari untuk melihat apakah anda punya kamar hanya buat semalam saja. Saya datang berobat dan tiba dari pantai Timur, dan ternyata tidak ada bis lagi sampai esok pagi." Ia bilang sudah mencoba mencari kamar sejak tadi siang tanpa hasil, tidak ada seorangpun tampaknya yang punya kamar.

"Aku rasa mungkin karena wajahku .. Saya tahu kelihatannya memang mengerikan, tapi dokterku bilang dengan beberapa kali pengobatan lagi..."

Untuk sesaat aku mulai ragu2, tapi kemudian kata-kata selanjutnya menenteramkan dan meyakinkanku: "Oh aku bisa kok tidur dikursi goyang diluar sini, di beranda samping ini. Toh bis ku esok pagi-pagi juga sudah berangkat." Aku katakan kepadanya bahwa kami akan mencarikan ranjang buat dia, untuk beristirahat di beranda.

Aku masuk kedalam menyelesaikan makan malam. Setelah rampung, aku mengundang pria tua itu, kalau-kalau ia mau ikut makan. "Wah, terima kasih, tapi saya sudah bawa cukup banyak makanan." Dan ia menunjukkan sebuah kantung kertas coklat. Selesai dengan mencuci piring, aku keluar mengobrol dengannya beberapa menit. Tak butuh waktu lama untuk melihat bahwa orang tua ini memiliki sebuah hati yang terlampau besar untuk dijejalkan ketubuhnya yang kecil ini.

Dia bercerita ia menangkap ikan untuk menunjang putrinya, kelima anak-anaknya, dan istrinya, yang tanpa daya telah lumpuh selamanya akibat luka di tulang punggung. Ia bercerita itu bukan dengan berkeluh kesah dan mengadu, malah sesungguhnya, setiap kalimat selalu didahului dengan ucapan syukur pada Allah untuk suatu berkat! Ia berterima kasih bahwa tidak ada rasa sakit yang menyertai penyakitnya, yang rupa-rupanya adalah semacam kanker kulit. Ia bersyukur pada Allah yang memberinya kekuatan untuk bisa terus maju dan bertahan.

Saatnya tidur, kami bukakan ranjang lipat kain berkemah untuknya dikamar anak-anak. Esoknya waktu aku bangun, seprei dan selimut sudah rapi terlipat dan pria tua itu sudah berada di beranda. Ia menolak makan pagi, tapi sesaat sebelum ia berangkat naik bis, ia berhenti sebentar, seakan meminta suatu bantuan besar, ia berkata, "Permisi, bolehkah aku datang dan tinggal disini lagi lain kali bila aku harus kembali berobat? Saya sungguh tidak akan merepotkan anda sedikitpun. Saya bisa kok tidur enak dikursi."Ia berhenti sejenak dan lalu menambahkan, "Anak-anak Anda membuatku begitu merasa kerasan seperti di rumah sendiri. Orang dewasa rasanya terganggu oleh rupa buruknya wajahku, tetapi anak-anak tampaknya tidak terganggu."

Aku katakan silahkan datang kembali setiap saat. Ketika ia datang lagi, ia tiba pagi-pagi jam tujuh lewat sedikit. Sebagai oleh-oleh, ia bawakan seekor ikan besar dan satu liter kerang oyster terbesar yang pernah kulihat. Ia bilang, pagi sebelum berangkat, semuanya ia kuliti supaya tetap bagus dan segar. Aku tahu bisnya berangkat jam 4.00 pagi, entah jam berapa ia sudah harus bangun untuk mengerjakan semuanya ini bagi kami. Selama tahun-tahun ia datang dan tinggal bersama kami, tidak pernah sekalipun ia datang tanpa membawakan kami ikan atau kerang oyster atau sayur mayur dari kebunnya. Beberapa kali kami terima kiriman lewat pos, selalu lewat kilat khusus, ikan dan oyster terbungkus dalam sebuah kotak penuh daun bayam atau sejenis kol, setiap helai tercuci bersih. Mengetahui bahwa ia harus berjalan sekitar 5 km untuk mengirimkan semua itu, dan sadar betapa sedikit penghasilannya, kiriman-kiriman dia menjadi makin bernilai.

Ketika aku menerima kiriman oleh-oleh itu, sering aku teringat kepada komentar tetangga kami pada hari ia pulang ketika pertama kali datang. "Ehhh, kau terima dia bermalam ya, orang yang luar biasa jelek menjijikkan mukanya itu? Tadi malam ia kutolak. Waduhh, celaka dehh.., kita kan bakal kehilangan langganan kalau nerima orang macam gitu!" Oh ya, memang boleh jadi kita kehilangan satu dua tamu. Tapi seandainya mereka sempat mengenalnya,mungkin penyakit mereka bakal jadi akan lebih mudah untuk dipikul. Aku tahu kami sekeluarga akan selalu bersyukur, sempat dan telah mengenalnya; dari dia kami belajar apa artinya menerima yang buruk tanpa mengeluh, dan yang baik dengan bersyukur kepada Allah.

Baru-baru ini aku mengunjungi seorang teman yang punya rumah kaca. Ketika ia menunjukkan tanaman bunganya, kami sampai pada satu tanaman krisan [timum] yang paling cantik dari semuanya, lebat penuh tertutup bunga berwarna kuning emas. Tapi aku jadi heran sekali, melihat ia tertanam dalam sebuah ember tua, sudah penyok berkarat pula. Dalam hati aku berkata, "Kalau ini tanamanku, pastilah sudah akan kutanam didalam bejana terindah yang kumiliki."

Tapi temanku merubah cara pikirku. "Ahh, aku sedang kekurangan pot saat itu," ia coba terangkan, "Dan tahu ini bakal cantik sekali, aku pikir tidak apalah sementara aku pakai ember loak ini. Toh cuma buat sebentar saja, sampai aku bisa menanamnya ditaman."

Ia pastilah terheran-heran sendiri melihat aku tertawa begitu gembira, tapi aku membayangkan kejadian dan skenario seperti itu disurga. "Hah, yang ini luar biasa bagusnya," mungkin begitulah kata Allah saat Ia sampai pada jiwa nelayan tua baik hati itu." Ia pastilah tidak akan keberatan memulai dulu didalam badan kecil ini." Semua ini sudah lama terjadi, dulu dan kini, didalam taman Allah, betapa tinggi mestinya berdirinya jiwa manis baik ini.

"Bukan yang dilihat manusia yang dilihat Allah; manusia melihat apa yang didepan mata, tetapi Tuhan melihat hati." (1 Samuel 16:7b).

Sumber: Jawaban.Com

It's a Matter of Personal "Standard"

Last night, my elderly brother, his wife, and his daughter (Abigail, 4 years old) picked me up to go to SW. Yap, we just have our Thursday fellowship, as usual hehehe...

In the middle of our way, Abigail talked in english to his mom. She asked, "Mommy, What is a shark? Is it like a whale?" Hearing that, I was just so amazed... she's just 4 years old! I imagined back then, at the same age, I couldn't speak nor understand English yet... Yea I know, Abi's school uses English as their primary language, so no wonder if the students naturally get used to speak in English...

Another insight, the same message, I got today... My colleague who didn't familiar with online forums, has just registered on our web's forum. When my other colleague told her to open her mail first to verify her new account, she said, "Ow... why is it so complicated?"

Suddenly I realized that it's just a matter of personal "standard"... If we think something is difficult, then it becomes difficult for us... Vice versa.

In Abigail's case, she identify English as her usual language... In her brain, English is just an alternative language to Indonesian (or Javanese hehehe...), but it doesnt sound more complicated... because she's used to speak English everyday. It's just a normal thing for her.

In my colleague's case, the normal (and usual) forum's registration procedure sounds so complicated, because this is her first time to join an online forum. But to me, the procedure is just a normal thing, because I've registered to many forums and they have the same procedure.

These cases are natural though... When you do something new for the first time (or being the one who do something while another people haven't done it yet), it feels more complicated, more difficult, or maybe more challenging. But the important thing to remember is... don't ever restrict your personal "standard". When you think something is possible, then it is possible for you. But if you think something is impossible for you to get, then it is impossible for you.

Being in charge of our thoughts and manage our mindset is not an easy task... I know... but we just have to do it again and again. Why? Because His truth is our manual guide to live as His beloved sons and daughters... It's a natural thing for us to live in it...

So... come on rise up!

Kinda Feeling Numb...

I don't know what is happening to me... Last night my elderly sister asked me how I feel and I said to her, I didn't feel anything, just flat... It's like just walking through day by day without any precious meaning... and unfortunately, I don't know why...

Maybe my heart is getting cold... just maybe... coz somehow I feel that I don't care much about anyone or anything... It's not that I hate everything... I just feel flat... I guess there are few reasons for this... But I still have to figure them out... by pray and digging into myself...

Probably it's because I have some heart matters that haven't been solved yet... and they have piled up or became more complicated, so I just have to untangle the twisted knots one by one...

Hmm... I have to do it soon... before I get more "numb"...
Please pray for me...
Thanx friends... ^.^

Husbands: Here's How to Have a Great Wife!

(Andrew Tallman)

Ternyata oh Ternyata...

Barusan aku kan cek FS... ternyata ada yang liat itu dari profile FS-nya salah satu forum (yang jelas bukan forum Jawaban.Com hehehe). Trus aku akhirnya jadi buka forum itu 'n iseng join jadi membernya.

"Just Do It"

Hehehehe... I'm not writing as much as before, yap that's the fact... I don't know why, maybe it's because here I've got people whom I can talk to, or probably it's an effect of change itself =p different habitat caused different habits... something like that...

Whatever it is, at a point I think it's better for me... coz I don't wanna be just a writer, but more and foremost, a doer. Like Nike's popular line, "Just Do It"

I don't wanna be someone who writes or talks about how to do certain thing in the right way, only to be found out later by other people that he/she himself/herself doesn't do things properly like he/she has said before. That kind of reality has made many people suffered from bitterness...

Though "walk the talk" is a good quote, but who can guarantee that? Sometimes we still can slip, as a human... So it might be better to be a living example... Like what I've been learning from my elderly brother, the way he lives, the way he acts... I see that his reality and his words are justifying towards each other. That is so powerful and has affected my life ever since... I remember once he said this to me, "I always try to do the truth first, live in it first, before I preach or say it to others..."

So, I just enjoy this change... that's why lately I seldom updating my blog =p Anyway, I will share a bit of my recent activities... In my new office, I'm learning phpBB 3.0.3 forum, as a part of our website launching preparation... and I'm still communicating with the programmer from Kairos Multimedia too... There are so many things to prepare with some people...

My daily activities, hmm... just as usual... after work sometimes if I need to buy food or snacks I go to Indomaret, but if not, I usually just stay in my room at my dorm, enjoying unlimited internet connection for a while to browse few things and also playing with my virtual pet on Facebook hehehe... or reading book (though not as much as I used to) or watching DVD or watching TV (but usually just for 1 hour or so). Once a week in work days I meet my community in my elderly brother's place and have a fellowship together...

Yap, just that hehehe... There are still many things to learn and to gain... yet there are also many things to be thankful of... "Just keep swimming!" like Dori said in "Finding Nemo" hehehe...

Fay Has a Better Social Life Here ^.^

That's the status I wrote on Friendster, Facebook, and also Hi5 hehehe... The fact is... this is a new season for me. There are many changes and also adjustments that I need to cope with... yah meskipun perubahannya ga segede yang aku alamin waktu 4 taun lalu pindah dari Surabaya ke Lippo Cikarang hehehe...

Beberapa hari lalu aku sempat cerita tentang ini ke seseorang. Aku mengira ('n berharap) dia juga bisa ikutan seneng... Tapi ternyata responnya ga kayak yang aku harapkan... "Jangan terlalu cepat menilai...," katanya.

Hmmm... I don't think I'm too fast to judge... Jadi inget cerita ini:

Once there was an old man who lived in a tiny village. Although poor, he was envied by all, because he owned a beautiful white horse. People offered fabulous prices for the horse, but the old man always refused. “This horse is a friend, not a possession,” he would respond.

One morning the horse was not in the stable. All the villagers said, “You old fool. We told you someone would steal that beautiful horse. You could at least have gotten the money. Now the horse is gone, and you’ve been cursed with misfortune.”

The old man responded, “Perhaps. All I know is that my horse is gone; the rest I do not know. Whether it be a curse or a blessing, I can’t say.”

After fifteen days the horse returned. He hadn’t been stolen; he had run away into the forest. Not only had he returned, he had brought a dozen wild horses back with him. Once again the village people gathered around the old man and said, “You were right – what we thought was a curse was a blessing. Please forgive us.” The old man responded, “Perhaps. Once again you’ve gone too far. How do you know if this is a blessing or a curse? Unless you can see the whole story, how can you judge?” But the people could only see the obvious. The old man now had twelve additional horses that could be broken and sold for a great deal of money.

The old man had a son, an only son. He began to break the wild horses. Unfortunately, after just a few days, he fell from a horse and broke both his legs. Once again the villagers gathered around the old man and said, “You were right. The wild horses were not a blessing; they were a curse. Your only son has broken his legs and now in your old age you have no one to help you. You are poorer than ever.” But the old man said, “Perhaps. Don’t go so far. Say only that my son broke his legs. We have only a fragment of the whole story.”

It so happened that a few weeks later the country went to war with a neighboring country. All the young men of the village were required to join the army. Only the son of the old man was excluded, because he had two broken legs. Once again the people gathered around, crying because there was little chance their sons would return. “You were right, old man. Your son’s accident was a blessing. Our sons are gone forever.”

The old man spoke again. “You people are always quick to jump to conclusions. Only God knows the final story.”

We have only a fragment of the whole story. Only God knows the final story.

*copied from cbn.com ----------- end of story --------------

My status is simply an expression of my happy and grateful mind... it doesn't mean that I'm not grateful for my previous season in Lippo Cikarang and being over-glorify my current condition... However, we just have to learn to have a grateful heart in everything, right?

I just simply grateful for my current season... In the previous season He had separated me from everything and everyone I knew so I could learn to trust Him much more than before. This season, He had brought me back to Surabaya, to my community, close to my extended families, and close to my friends... Is it wrong to be excited and happy? Of course not... =p

Lagian, Dia emang tau waktu yang tepat kok hehehe... Kalo aku lebih lama lagi sendirian di sana... bisa-bisa aku tambah terbiasa sendirian 'n asik sendiri... secara aku orangnya kan lebih task-oriented ketimbang people-oriented hehehe... Padahal kan harus seimbang =p So I guess now is a season to connect with people more than before... ^.^

New Season Has Come

It's time to let go
When all you see is changes
It's time to turn your eyes from past
When things moving away without your ability to hold them

It's time to let go
When your friends have changed their priority
It's time to bless them and move forward
When a new season come at your sight

It's time to let go
When each of us walking toward different paths
It's time to embrace the future
When God leads your step into a new door

It's time to let go
...and to let loose
For everything is His possession
It's time to look ahead and prepare

For a new season has come...

Going Out with Aaltje

Iya, ejaannya emang Aaltje hehehe... Tapi manggilnya Alce. Dia ini temen SMAku, kita sekelas pas kelas 3. Kalo diliat ke belakang, kenanganku ama dia tu yang paling lucu ini: pernah 1 hari, waktu itu pelajaran matematika 'n gurunya lagi ngejelasin di papan tulis. Na kita kan duduk sebangku... aku lagi bosen tuh, jadi aku isengin dia, kan dia orangnya geli-an. Jadi aku geser-geserin kakiku ke kakinya. Dia spontan noleh ke aku sambil ngomong, "Fifi!" Aku cuman nyengir-nyengir sambil nahan ketawa. Walo maksud hati Alce berbisik tapi rupanya si guru denger, cuman waktu itu beliau ga komen apa-apa.

Behind the Mask

(by George Halitzka)

A Self Evolution?

I just wonder... Am I in the middle of a self-evolution? Bu zhi dao hehehe... It’s just kinda strange because I feel my addiction to blogging or other online activities has decreased since I got to Surabaya...

The Meaning of Struggle

Struggle is a sign of life

Minta Slip Biru Kalo Ditilang Polantas

Dari Millis Tetangga: 

ada info begini: 

Guys... Sekedar info nih. Kalau kena tilang, langsung minta aja Slip Biru. Polisi Lalulintas itu punya 2 slip. Slip Merah dan Slip Biru. Kalau Slip Merah, berarti kita menyangkal kalau melanggar aturan dan mau membela diri secara hukum. Kalau kita dapat Slip Merah, berarti kita akan disidang. Dan SIM kita harus kita ambil di pengadilan setempat. Tapi ngerti sendiri kan prosesnya? Nguantri yg panjang bgt. Belom lagi calo2 yang bejibun. 

Tetapi kalau Slip Biru kita mengakui kesalahan kita dan bersedia membayar denda. kita tinggal transfer dana ke nomer rekening tertentu (BNI kalo ga salah). Abis gitu kita tinggal bawa bukti transfer untuk di tukar dengan SIM kita di kapolsek terdekat dimana kita ditilang. Misalnya, kita ditilang di Perempatan Mampang-Kuningan, kita tinggal ambil SIM kita di Polsek Mampang. Dan denda yang tercantum dalam KUHP Pengguna Jalan Raya itu tidak melebihi Rp. 50.000,- dan dananya Resmi, masuk ke Kas Negara. Jadi, kalau ada Polantas yang sampe minta undertable Rp. 75.000,- atau Rp. 100.000,- pasti masuk kantong sendiri. 

Trust me guys, I've been doing this before. Waktu kena tilang di Bundaran Kebayoran (Ratu Plaza). Saya memotong garis marka. Karena dari arah senopati sebelumnya saya berfikir untuk ke arah Senayan, tetapi di tengah jalan saya berubah pikiran untuk lewat sudirman saja. Dan saya memotong jalan. Saya berhenti di lampu merah arah sudirman. Dan tiba-tiba Seorang polisi menghampiri dan mengetok kaca mobil. Dia tanya, apa saya tau kesalahan saya? Ya saya bilang nggak tau. Trus dia bilang kalau saya memotong Garis Marka (atau apalah namanya, garis yang bukan garis putus-putus) . Saya cuman bilang, masa sih pak? saya nggak liat. Maafin deh pak. Tapi dia ngotot meminta SIM saya. Alhasil saya harus berhenti sejenak untuk bernegosiasi. Dia meminta Rp. 70.000,-. Dengan alasan, kawasan itu adalah Kawasan Tertib Lalulintas. "Nyetir sambil nelfon aja ditilang mbak!". Dia bilang gitu. Saya kembali ke mobil, dan berbicara sama teman saya yang kebetulan menemani perjalanan saya. 

Teman saya bilang, "Udah kasih aja Rp. 20.000,- kalo ga mau loe minta Slip Biru aja". Dengan masih belum tau apa itu Slip Biru, saya kembali menghampiri pak polisi sambil membawa uang pecahan Rp. 20.000,-. "Pak, saya cuman ada segini." Si polisi dengan arogannya berkata, "Yaahh.. segitu doang sih buat beli kacang juga kurang mbak". Sambil tertawa melecehkan dengan teman2nya sesama `Polisi Penjaga`. "Ya udah deh pak, kalo gitu tilang aja. Tapi saya minta Slip yang warna Biru ya pak!". 

Seketika saya melihat raut wajah ketiga polisi itu berubah. Dan dengan nada pelan salah satu temannya itu membisikkan, tapi saya masih mendengar karna waktu itu saya berada di dalam pos. "Ya udah, coba negoin lagi, kalo ga bisa ga papalah. Penglaris, Mangsa Pertama. Hahahaha..." . Sambil terus mencoba ber-nego. Akhirnya saya yang menjadi pemenang dalam adu nego tersebut. Dan mereka menerima pecahan Rp. 20.000,- yang saya tawarkan dan mengembalikan SIM saya. Dalam 

perjalanan, teman saya baru menjelaskan apa itu Slip Biru. 

So, kalo ditilang, minta Slip Biru aja ya! Kita bisa membayangkan dong, bagaimana wajah sang polantas begitu kita bilang, "Saya tilang aja deh pak, saya mengaku salah telah menerobos lampu merah. Tolong Slip Biru yah!". Pasti yang ada dalam benak sang polisi "Yaahh... ngga jadi panen deh gue..." 

He Had Prepared Everything...

Beberapa hari kemaren aku sempet baca-baca halaman diary sebelum aku pindahan dari Lippo Cikarang ke Surabaya. Trus barusan ini, mumpung pas lagi online dari kos (hidup isat-eco! walau kadang dirimu ga stabil, tapi ya sudahlah aku kan tipe yang nrimo hihihi...), aku baca postingan-postingan blogku soal yang panik mau pindahan itu: di sini...

Will Be Busy

Start from next week I will be busy working on the web... Well, not the programming things, but I have to prepare my office's web....

My Isat-Eco Is Activated!

Today I got a phone call from Indosat, she said my indosat-eco (unlimited internet package) was already activated. So later at 12:00 mid noon I'm gonna go to Galeri Indosat (Kayoon street) to buy the modem. 

Godaan 'n Renewing Our Mind

Selama beberapa hari lalu otakku sempet "hang"... Sampe kalo diinget-inget sekarang aku juga jadi heran kenapa yah aku bisa sampe mikir se-complicated itu hehehe...

I'm Back on Track...

Recently I have many self centered thoughts... I also have many worries because I was thinking too far =p

Are Our Troubles a Blessing or a Curse?

(by Dan Miller)

Like most of you, I have been hearing a lot of personal examples of “disaster” this week. No gas, no job, no retirement fund, worthless stock, cancelled vacations, and general uncertainty. Rather than trying to create something profound I’d like to share this old story.
Once there was an old man who lived in a tiny village. Although poor, he was envied by all, because he owned a beautiful white horse. People offered fabulous prices for the horse, but the old man always refused. “This horse is a friend, not a possession,” he would respond.

One morning the horse was not in the stable. All the villagers said, “You old fool. We told you someone would steal that beautiful horse. You could at least have gotten the money. Now the horse is gone, and you’ve been cursed with misfortune.”

The old man responded, “Perhaps. All I know is that my horse is gone; the rest I do not know. Whether it be a curse or a blessing, I can’t say.”

After fifteen days the horse returned. He hadn’t been stolen; he had run away into the forest. Not only had he returned, he had brought a dozen wild horses back with him. Once again the village people gathered around the old man and said, “You were right – what we thought was a curse was a blessing. Please forgive us.” The old man responded, “Perhaps. Once again you’ve gone too far. How do you know if this is a blessing or a curse? Unless you can see the whole story, how can you judge?” But the people could only see the obvious. The old man now had twelve additional horses that could be broken and sold for a great deal of money.

The old man had a son, an only son. He began to break the wild horses. Unfortunately, after just a few days, he fell from a horse and broke both his legs. Once again the villagers gathered around the old man and said, “You were right. The wild horses were not a blessing; they were a curse. Your only son has broken his legs and now in your old age you have no one to help you. You are poorer than ever.” But the old man said, “Perhaps. Don’t go so far. Say only that my son broke his legs. We have only a fragment of the whole story.”

It so happened that a few weeks later the country went to war with a neighboring country. All the young men of the village were required to join the army. Only the son of the old man was excluded, because he had two broken legs. Once again the people gathered around, crying because there was little chance their sons would return. “You were right, old man. Your son’s accident was a blessing. Our sons are gone forever.”

The old man spoke again. “You people are always quick to jump to conclusions. Only God knows the final story.”

And so it is with our lives. What we see as a blessing or a curse may simply be part of God's preparation for what lies ahead. Be careful in seeing “disaster” in any change. Just recognize it as change – which opens the door for good as well as bad – for gain as well as possible loss.

I’ve spent 20 years seeing people go through unexpected and unwelcome change – and have enjoyed seeing most move on to more opportunity, freedom, fulfillment and income.

Source: crosswalk

Early Days @ My New Office

Phewww... It's been ages! Finally I can get online! ^.^ Yea well at least that's how I feel hehehe... I haven't been online for about 2 weeks but since I'm an onliner, it feels like a decade! hehehe... a little dramatic =p

Jeda Dalam Hening

Learn to Embrace the CHANGE

Temporarily Offline

I might not have a chance to be online for a while, due to my moving to Surabaya. 2 hari perjalanan di mobil, survei kos-kosan baru, melajarin rute jalan, mudik dulu bentar, ke Surabaya lagi, mulai kerja... phew... a lot of changes and I think I need time to adjust myself and learn new rules and habits. So I still don't know my possibility to get online. But I will be online as soon as I can =p